See You on the White Side of the Moon, Trump to Build Space Wall

In a statement Wednesday Counselor to the President, and Joseph Goebbels disciple, Kellyanne Conway reported that President Trump is set to give an address to a joint session of Congress demanding that they approve a $370 trillion dollar infrastructure bill to build a wall in outer space encompassing the entire Earth. She went on to explain, “Space is a very dangerous place and we all know there are some very dangerous people flooding into the planet, I mean look what just happened on the International Space Station and the media won’t even report on it, they cut the feed.”

Trump held a rally in the ruins of Gatlinburg Tennessee Tuesday evening speaking to a large mass of what appeared to be zombies. (Sources later confirmed that they were merely angry, ash-covered local trailer park residents) He shouted to the crowd ,“look around you look what they’ve done here, do you really think this whole area would have been scorched with fire if it weren’t for all the very, very bad people flooding in from Space? Look what happened here, look what happened to New Orleans when the space hombres decided to flood the whole place, look what just happened last night on the moon! It was a total blood bath, a massacre, and the fake news isn’t telling you about it.”

Stephen Miller, top White House Fellatio Specialist, was later asked by reporters for clarifying comments, as there has yet to be a single documented attack from outer space in recorded human history, responded by saying “the President is 100% completely right about everything he has ever said since he was a baby in his mother’s womb. How dare you question leader. He’s the smartest human being who has ever lived and he knows things about space and the people in space that nobody else does. He is going to build the wall in Space and on the Mexican border. We are going to be double safe and that is exactly what people voted for.”

 

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