Former “Pussy-Grabber” warns Trump, “It doesn’t end there, brother. Be careful.”

By now, you’re probably aware of the conversation between Billy Bush and Donald Trump, in which Trump stated, “Grab the pussy. You can do anything.”  If you were like me, when you read that quote for the first time, you cringed a little, thought to yourself, “what a creep”, and moved on.  John Jordan has a different reaction; a sinister laugh, followed by tears and uncontrollable sobbing.  Jordan doesn’t view this as a singular tasteless comment, he sees it as the initial symptom of a condition that is hard to shake.  He should know.  John Jordan is also a pussy-grabber.  At least that’s where he got his start.

“It’s inevitable, man.  You’re out having a good time, you figure, ‘what the hell.  I’m gonna grab a pussy.’  Next thing you know, you’re in your car trying to find a place where you can choke a chicken.”  Jordan’s eyes look glassy and cold as he recalls haunting events from his past.  “Hell, I’ve even spanked a god-damned monkey before.  Can you believe that?  Who the fuck does that.  Terrible.  Just terrible.”  You can almost sense a tangible weight being lifted off of the 52 year old’s shoulders.  He’s ready to put it all out there.  “Listen to me, man.  I’ve even heard of sick fucks going around looking for dolphins to flog.  I’ve never done it.  I’ve only heard about it.”

Jordan warns Donald Trump of what he refers to as “the most slipperiest path I’ve ever gone down.  Covered with all sorts of oils and lubes.  It’s slippery as a mother fucker.”  Jordan says he grabbed his first pussy when he was 17 years old.  He’s been a troubled human being ever since.  It’s not all doom and gloom, however, as Jordan is very thankful that he was able to regain control before doing the unthinkable.  “It doesn’t always end with the animals; you know the pussies, chickens, monkeys and dolphins.  I’ve been told that one guy actually went as far as punching the one eyed clown.  Sick mother fucker.”

 

 

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